|
Uhhhh, but you can keep the weird tinfoil boiler suit...
You will have noticed, as I have, that not even that source of all things engineeringly wonderful (Audi) have brought out something that takes you to work in the morning at 3,000 feet.
So if we want to get to work at 3,000 ft, we either have to be a Certified Flight Instructor, own a microlight (and, um, work somewhere with a half decent sized lawn), or drive a plane near the Hudson last February... although you'll not be at 3,000ft for long...
Is anybody else still amazed that thing survived a landing on water at 150mph?
And on that subject, I'm obsessed with planes, and with good right. I'd love to be obsessed with the latest Audi hovering saloon car thing, but instead I must content myself with giant metallic paraffin budgies owned by huge faceless corporations.
So this blog is me proving to you that's it's not all boring white British Airways jumbo jets - there's lots of weird and wonderful stuff out there, and some of it is fookin' hilarious.
For example, Hugh Heffner's plane looks like a giant black phallus...
How cool is that!
Sometimes the most interesting planes are the least obvious... you know what this is, climbing out of Las Vegas's McCarran International?
Every morning half a dozen of these things take off, and pretend to head east to the Tonopah Test Range.... but instead, they head south(ish) and land at that giant realm of secretness, Area 51!
Those are the infamous Janet flights...
Rumours about extraterrestrial pilots are unconfirmed.
You know Iron Maiden? That awesome metal band from the decades before I was born (I'm not as old as you look...) well, lead singer, Bruce Dickinson, has a very interesting looking office these days.
And there's not even a Newton's ball in sight...
This is Ed Force One, the Azureus 757 that Iron Maiden leased for their 2008 tour. Azureus is the airline that Bruce actually flies for when not touring with t'band.
So what about the weird and wonderfuls?
Ever wonder why the engines on a plane are mounted UNDER the wings?
Well, they're not always, take the Fokker VFW-614 for example...
It wasn't very successful. Probably cos it looks bloody strange.
Ever wondered what a plane looks like without paint?
Now you know!
Did you ever know that Concorde had a very tasty sponsor?
Although it didn't last long. And it was only on the Air France ones, not the British Airways ones. :-(
Speaking of interesting paint jobs, Alaska Airlines has a bloke with a giant afro on its tail!!!
Or maybe it's an eskimo in a fur coat...
Is there a more friendly looking livery than Southwest?
Ever wonder what happens to the first-built planes? No... I suspect that's probably just in the brains of plane geeks like me...
This monstrosity is the first Boeing 767. Rather than being saved for posterity like most of the Boeing products, it was ripped apart by the US Army / NASA and had a giant reconnaissance head tumour installed.
And now it's in the desert rotting. Such a pity. :-(
The first 757 (which was made at the same time as its bubble headed sister has a farrrrr more interesting role.
You know the F-22 stealth fighter thingy?
That is a cool aircraft. But they're testing bits of it on the original 757...
Which is cool and a bit of a waste at the same time...
Note the pointy fighter-jet nose!
Hey. You know John Travolta? He was in some little movie in the 80's called Grease (or was it the 70s?). And in the 90's he flew a B-2 Spirit in Broken Arrow alongside Christian Slater...
You can see (sort of) the low-profile B-2 in the middle of that image.
Although this is what it looks like in a plan view...
That is a bad-ass aircraft!
Well, Travolta took some flying lessons and bought himself a little plane...
Or three...
His Gulfstream II...
His L-1329 Jetstream...
Oh, did I mention he bought something small so he can keep it on his driveway?
Yup... the sod's only bought himself an ex-QANTAS Boeing 707 for his family's summer holidays round-the-world trips...
Yup that's all his...
Oh bugger off John...
(Jealous? Me? No....)
Actually he used to own a Connie too:
If you like planes, Connies are like the holy grail.
On the subject of big private jets, did you know the President of the United States actually owns two 'Air Force One' planes? Tail numbers 28000 and 29000.
And it's not actually called Air Force One. Air Force One is ANY US Air Force plane that the Prez is on.
Here's the birds at Prestwick in Scotland!
And finally, you know The Offspring?
Well, lead singer/guitarist/song writer (who also has a Masters degree in molecular biology or something - it's lucky nobody likes a smart arse) also flies...
He even flies in the Jet Races at Reno!
His plane is also a Jet (impressive, if a bit pale in comparison to Travolta's beasty.
Although Travolta's retro QANTAS livery can't quite hold a candle to Dexter's aawwwwwwsome 'ANARCHY' symbol on his vertical stabiliser (fin, tail, thing).
With all this knowledge of flying stuff, we still can't make flying cars?
How utterly devastating.
Plane Geek, over and out.
Pages: 1
|
login